The Overparenting Solution

In this examination of helicopter-parenting, readers learn that one in four parents believes they are the biggest barrier to their children’s independence, and that a study in Beijing posited that overparenting has a detrimental effect on children’s leadership skills, emotional well-being, decision making, and academic performance. Another shows a historical upward trend in the average amount of time modern parents and children spend together; psychiatrist Glass finds that much of this time is now spent on coordinating extracurricular activities or preparing college applications. Here he and Tabatsky analyze parental types (the Protector, the Intervener, the Controller, the Negotiator, the Best-Friender) and share tactics for modeling independence, leadership skills, and decision making. Solid ideas for moving away from overparenting. * Library Journal *
This empathetic and easygoing consideration of contemporary parenting styles offers concerned readers definitions, examples, self-checks, and explanations of why some parental units hover, control, and try to dictate their kids’ lives. Psychiatrist Glass and writer and editor Tabatsky take the benign approach that all parents mean well, but don’t understand the damage they do when they coddle and intervene, over-schedule, force expectations, demand perfection, or treat their offspring like possessions in some kind of a competition. They use anecdotes to expose various patterns of behavior, hoping to let parents see themselves and their questionable tactics, and acknowledge the fears and insecurities that might prompt these kinds of behaviors. The overall tone is reassuring and upbeat, and repeated admonitions include assurances that no parents really know what they’re doing, and that parents should truly listen to their kids to find out what they want. Filled with practical advice and actionable solutions, this book offers solid guidance to parents who need a little support. * Booklist *
The Overparenting Solution is full of insight and understanding. Glass and Tabatsky offer great first-hand advice and the selected episodes Dr. Glass shares from his practice are especially poignant. Readers can draw comfort from reading about others who have lived through similar confusing life passages. There is no psychobabble here. Parents today need a sharp and thoughtful wake-up call about raising kids in a changing environment. -- Anandhi Narasimhan, MD, family psychiatrist, Los Angeles, CA
Glass and Tabatsky have written a “how to” book to help parents navigate this difficult and wonderful thing called parenting. Since they have both “been there and done that,” they speak with authority and offer professional and personal insight, which makes the book appealing and helpful. Here are two people who have learned how to parent! -- Mark Banschick, family psychiatrist, Katonah, New York
We are required to demonstrate skills, even mastery, and earn a license before being allowed to do most things considered important—but not being a parent, perhaps the most important and complex job of all. In The Overparenting Solution, Glass and Tabatsky provide a road map to guide parents, with advice based on expert opinion, stories, and experience caring for patients and families. Describing different parenting styles and outlining the pitfalls of overparenting, the authors support parents to do what is in the best interest of their children, helping them grow up to be confident, independent, and resilient, able to weather inevitable challenges as well as the joys of life. The book presents a compelling argument for formal training in parenting. This role is too important to leave to chance. -- Barbara J. Stoll, MD, dean emeritus, McGovern Medical School, University of Texas Health Sciences Center, Houston
I have been a family law specialist for more than 50 years. I have seen a dramatic increase in the kinds of problems that “overparenting” creates. It makes for unhappy, unsuccessful, and often troubled children. This results in children failing to thrive, as they would in a normal family environment. Again, and again, I have witnessed the truism that a parent is only as happy as their unhappiest child, which is often the result of overparenting. Dr. Glass not only details how the process has developed; he also provides reasonable approaches to prevent negative outcomes for the entire family. I will recommend this book to many of my clients. -- Earle S. Lilly, founding president, Texas Academy of Family Law Specialists, past president, Gulf Coast Family Law Specialists
Dr. George Glass is an experienced psychiatrist and accomplished writer with significant clinical and first-hand experience with parenting and related issues. His new book is an enjoyable read and should be of great help to all parents and parents-to-be––an excellent addition! -- Jair C. Soares, MD, PhD, professor, chairman of psychiatry and behavioral sciences,
Dr. George Glass, psychiatrist, father and grandfather, shares his insights on overparenting, and in doing so, he presents a very thoughtful and knowledgeable explanation on how to successfully parent your children in today’s challenging situations. This book is a must read for any parent striving to do their best. -- Louis A. Faillace, MD, professor emeritus, retired chairman, University of Texas Medical School in Houston
Dr. Glass is a caring, compassionate, and empathic psychiatrist. As a clinical psychologist and attorney, I’ve enjoyed working with him on significant and complex cases. The Overparenting Solution is outstanding, an excellent resource for mental health professionals and family law attorneys. It will also be a useful guide for grandparents raising children. -- Bob Gordon, MD, clinical psychologist and attorney, former president, Texas Psychological Association
This is a timely, informative, and well-reasoned book by talented professionals speaking to parents seeking success for their children in today’s competitive world. The book focuses on parents who tend to be controlling and manipulating of their child and their learning and social environments. This “helicopter parenting” is deemed to be less effective than parenting based on active listening, observation and assessment, and motivating children to pursue their own individual goals, skills, talents, and abilities, as opposed to those selected by the parent. The authors provide many examples of the effects of overparenting and clarify their objectives and the solutions. This book is essential, relevant, and enjoyable reading for every parent at every stage of their child’s development, whether the parent is experienced or not, and operating with or without a coparent. -- Jim York, senior district court judge, retired presiding judge of 246th Family District Court of Harris County, Texas, board-certified in family law and civil trial law