Do Not Open This Book

'A marketer's dream': Andy Lee's kids' book crashes website, sells 40,000 in two days
A website crash isn't something you'd usually welcome, but for small independent children's book publisher Lake Press it was a sign of triumph.
The company's bandwidth was flooded after the surprise release of a children's book from the radio personality and comedian Andy Lee, who co-hosts the radio show Hamish & Andy with Hamish Blake. Titled Do Not Open This Book, it has sold approximately 40,000 copies since Lee announced it on radio on Wednesday evening.
Illustrated by Heath McKenzie, the book was conceived by Lee as a surprise giftfor his sister Alex Miles for her son's first birthday. Miles is a children's book author in her own right, penning eight novels in the Zac Power series under the pseudonym HI Larry.
Lee originally intended to make only a single copy of the book, which he told Fairfax on Thursday that he wrote during a plane trip: "When you don't think something is going to be published you have less worry about it," he said.

But after he handed it over to the publisher, they recommended a wider release.
Overnight success of this kind is rare for a children's book author in Australia - according to the Australian Society of Authors chief executive, Juliet Rogers, most would be lucky to see a first print run of 3000. Lee's book, on the other hand, had a starting print run of 60,000, even with a moratorium - imposed by Lee - on any pre-publicity.
"It's a marketer's dream," Rogers said, explaining how difficult it was for most authors to break into the Australian market. "Children's publishing has had a bit of a renaissance in the last couple of years so it's not been any worse [than other genres]," she said. "But it's always tough."
The Lake Press spokeswoman Sarah Ryan told Guardian Australia that the publishing company welcomed the boon brought by such a big name. "It's great for us," she said. "We're a small children's book publisher and it means we get exposure and means our books can be distributed more widely.

"It's a great book on its own merits," she continued. "It's not just a good book because Andy Lee wrote it."
The challenge to sell a book will always be harder for unknown names, but Rogers didn't fear a backlash from disgruntled authors: "On the whole, this is a very generous-hearted industry," she said.

-- Stephanie Convery * The Guardian *

We beg you, we implore you...PLEASE DO NOT CLICK ON THIS REVIEW...!
OK, you were warned, we're now going to tell you (mercilessly) all about "Do Not Open This Book" by Andy Lee and Heath McKenzie.

As you can see, it sets its table out very early on - with a blue monster imploring you NOT to crack open the covers of this amusing tale.

"Go Read Something else" he pleads, but we've never been ones for following advice like "don't read books" so undaunted we took a deep dive in.

There's a cool story trope that we've seen a number of times that operates like this, warning the reader with every turn of the page that dire things may be in store...

Blue Monster is determined to keep a secret - but what is it? Obviously you'll have to ignore his pleas and find out, curious little person that you are...!

Monster gets so desperate to stop you reading that he brings in the BIG guns..Mum and Dad...

ANYWAY, by now you get the idea. The story trickles along but thanks to Heath's awesome art there's plenty of character here. As we say, we've seen this story theme used a few times before and if we're brutally honest, the art just about saves this one by the scruff of its neck.

* Read it Dad